Cup of Life Read online

  Table of Contents

  Chapter 1

  Chapter 2

  Chapter 3

  Chapter 4

  Chapter 5

  Chapter 6

  Chapter 7

  Chapter 8

  Chapter 9

  Afterword

  Everlasting Circle

  About the Author

  Also by Juliana Haygert:

  Cup of Life

  The Everlast Trilogy Book 3

  Juliana Haygert

  Copyright

  This book is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents either are products of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, events, or locales is entirely coincidental.

  Copyright © 2017 by Juliana Haygert.

  All rights reserved. This book or any portion thereof may not be reproduced or used in any manner whatsoever without the express written permission of the publisher except for the use of brief quotations in a book review.

  Manufactured in the United States of America.

  First Edition January 2014

  Second Edition June 2016

  Third Edition December 2017

  www.JulianaHaygert.com

  Edited by H. Danielle Crabtree

  Proofreading by Running Ink Edits

  Cover design by Moonchildljilja at Fantasy Book Design

  Any trademark, service marks, product names, or names featured are the property of their respective owners, and are used only for reference. There is no implied endorsement if one of these terms is used.

  Created with Vellum

  Contents

  Chapter 1

  Chapter 2

  Chapter 3

  Chapter 4

  Chapter 5

  Chapter 6

  Chapter 7

  Chapter 8

  Chapter 9

  Afterword

  Everlasting Circle

  About the Author

  Also by Juliana Haygert:

  1

  Thirty or forty years ago, I wouldn’t have stared at the girl in front of me for more than five seconds before charming her into going to bed with me.

  But this girl ... this girl was different.

  “I think that’s everything,” Nadine said, stepping out of the cottage as Rok flew from the roof.

  It was early January. The lights around the cottage reflected off the three feet of snow and illuminated Nadine’s long brown hair, tinting some strands bronze. Her hair, her dark green eyes, and her red lips contrasted with her fair skin; the only thought on my mind was that I had never seen a more beautiful girl in my entire life. And I had been alive for quite some time.

  Nadine approached me, and as it was every time she looked at me, I fought the urge to reach to her, to pull her against me, to kiss her, to—

  “It is everything, isn’t it?” She glanced at the bag slung across my shoulder and the box in my arms. She held her sister’s stuffed bunny in one hand and a duffel bag in another.

  We had been moving to our new location all day, making several trips to and from, and now we were the last ones here.

  “I think so,” I replied, quickly glancing to Rok hovering above our heads. “Ready?”

  She walked down the porch steps, into the snow, and turned to the cottage. Her eyes scanned it, as if she wanted to take every little detail with her.

  She slung the duffel bag over her shoulder and flipped the collar of her jacket up. “It’s odd. I feel like I should feel bad for leaving this place after fleeing so many others, after losing so many people.” She sighed. “But I don’t, and I totally should, especially after seeing the new place Ceris got us.”

  I nodded, knowing too well that the new place brought her depressing memories.

  No matter. It was a new place, a new path on our journey, a new beginning. We were on the right track.

  I offered my arm to her. “Let’s go, darling.”

  With a half-smile that made my heart skip a beat, Nadine sauntered to me and hooked her arm with mine.

  I scooted closer to her, closer than necessary because I could and because I wanted to, and then I transported us out of there.

  New freaking York fucking City. That was where Ceris found a couple of intact buildings and apartments, one of the few Omi and the demons hadn’t completely destroyed when they invaded the city over a month ago. She had found many bodies in them though. Levi, Izaera, and I helped her clean the large third floor, four bedroom apartment she had chosen before she brought the others to the city.

  “They will never look for us here,” Ceris said, using her powers to scrub the walls clean of blood.

  She was probably right, but I knew Nadine wouldn’t be okay with it.

  When we brought the others, Nadine didn’t disguise her disgust, but made no other objections. She understood why Ceris had chosen this place, and she agreed with the goddess’s reasons. Still, it wasn’t easy for her.

  “Are you all right?” I asked as we walked among the debris, rumble, and flipped cars that lined the area around the apartment.

  Ceris, Levi, Izaera, and I had united our powers to build a strong ward around the place with a radius of three blocks. Then we cleaned paths that led to the building while moving bodies, cars, and broken glass out of the way.

  “I’m fine,” she answered, pointing the flashlight to our improvised trail. She wrinkled her nose at the smell of the decay and avoided looking around too much.

  We arrived at the building, crossed through the front doors, walked up three flights of stairs—the elevator was destroyed—and opened the door to the apartment.

  It wasn’t bad. A large living room with a fireplace, two sofas and four armchairs, a coffee table, lamps, and other decorative stuff, though most we had to throw away. Vases, pictures, paintings, rugs, pillows—all broken or tainted by blood—were now in the trash. Then there was a dining room for ten and a fully equipped kitchen. There was an office and half-bath in the front. Next to them was a corridor that led to four bedrooms, one being a suite, and two separate bathrooms.

  We had to replace most beds, comforters, and pillows, since those had also been destroyed during the invasion. We had to find generators and fuel for the electricity, and we had gone to a grocery store in Australia—so not to leave a trace around here—for food and drinks.

  We took all the furniture from the front office and transformed it into a gym. It was half the size of the gym we had in northern Greenland, but it was a place to burn some energy and stay sharp.

  Ceris and Levi had chosen the suite. Apparently, they were mending things between them. Zelen and I were sharing one of the bedrooms, while Izaera shared another one with Keisha. Nadine had picked the spare room all for herself. Lucky girl.

  I dropped the box in the living room as Nadine walked to the door of her bedroom and stared at the inside.

  “What is it, darling?” I followed her gaze. The furniture we had found was simple. A brown wooden queen bed and matching nightstand, thin mattress, and a dark blue comforter. Nothing else. No curtains, no rugs, no decorations, no drawer, no dresser—the same as the other bedrooms.

  “It’s so lifeless,” she muttered. “If the bed was made of metal, I would think we were in a prison.”

  A prison. That was what this was for her. This situation, this place, this war, the Soul Oath. Her prison.

  I leaned closer to her and kissed the top of her head, not sure what to say. She turned to me, with suspicion in her pretty eyes, as if she doubted my intentions. I guess she had no reason not to suspect my intentions. She once said she was tired of my mixed signals. I was too, but I couldn’t help myself. I tried with all my might to stay away from her, to not touch her, not hug her, not kiss her.
So far, I was failing.

  “Come on, darling. You love it when I kiss you.” Teasing came naturally to me, and she actually reacted the way she always should react with me: her brows knotted and she dismissed me. I should have stopped there. I should have walked away and left her be. Instead I nudged her arm with my elbow. “What?”

  “Nothing,” she said, her tone indicating it wasn’t really nothing. She sighed and stepped into her bedroom. “I guess I better ...” She gestured around the room, and I had no idea what she meant.

  Nevertheless, I went along with it. “Sure. Yeah.”

  She closed the door in my face.

  2

  First night in this apartment and sleep didn’t come easily. It was all Zelen’s fault. Apparently, he had decided his snores should wake the entire block.

  Tired of tossing and turning, I got up. Ceris had made sure the heat was on and set to a high temperature before going to bed, so I left the room in my pajamas pants and without a shirt.

  Barefoot, I walked along the hardwood floor trying not to make a lot of noise. I halted when I entered the living room, not sure what I wanted to do. There was no TV, no radio, and no books. I could exercise a little—I guess burning some pent-up energy wouldn’t be a bad idea—but I would probably make a lot of noise and wake everyone.

  In the end, I headed to the kitchen, grabbed a beer from the fridge, and sat on one of the stools around the island. I took a long swallow of the cold drink. Bah, I hadn’t drank any beer in so long. In little over three months actually, but it felt like years.

  The chilly liquid went down my throat, and I let out a huge “ah” of satisfaction.

  Damn, the thing was good.

  On instinct, my left hand went to the necklace around my neck. I was able to control this gesture when around others and when focused on something else, but alone? I always ended up touching it. Which was ridiculous. It belonged to the human who had carried me for nine months, the one who raised me as her child. In some twisted sense, I had been her child, and she had been my mother.

  For some reason since restoring my memory, I was weirdly unsettled about my feelings for the humans who had been my parents. Until then, I had loved them. I had adored them. I wanted to avenge them, remember them, keep their tokens. Then everything changed, but I still couldn’t take off this damn necklace.

  Nadine had been right, as usual—not that I would ever admit it out loud. To convince me to strike the Soul Oath with her, she tried to make me understand how much she needed to do something for her family by reminding me of my own. Back then, I would have done everything for them. Everything. That was why I ended up accepting the Soul Oath.

  Granted, when we made the deal I was sure I could repress my feelings for her. I was sure she was nothing more than something pretty to look at. However, I was kidding myself because she had already reached deep into me, and I didn’t want to admit it. Silly me because now the time was passing; it was flying, and I didn’t know how to fix this fucking oath.

  The problem was, I knew there was no fixing it. I didn’t want to accept that, so I tried not thinking about it. I tried to not remember I had screwed up.

  I finished the beer and considered going back to bed but decided Zelen would keep snoring, and I could use another drink. I threw the empty bottle in the trash and opened the fridge.

  I closed it when I heard mumbling.

  I kept still, paying attention to it. The mumbling sounded louder this time, and I followed it. I ended up facing the first bedroom’s door. Nadine’s.

  “No,” I heard her voice through the door. “Oh, God, please, no!”

  Knowing exactly what was going on, I swung the door open and entered the bedroom.

  “Nicole,” she whimpered, thrashing in her bed. “No, no!”

  I closed the door behind me and rushed to her side. “Nadine,” I called her, touching her shoulder. “Wake up, Nadine.”

  “Oh God, Morgan.” Then she screamed.

  I grabbed her upper arms and shook her, not too hard but not too gentle either. “Nadine!”

  Her scream died out, and her eyes flew open.

  “It was just a nightmare,” I said. Her lips quavered before she hid her face behind her hands. “It’s okay, darling, you’re safe.”

  She shook her head. “But they aren’t,” she said, her voice breaking.

  For a moment, I was undecided about what to do. Just pat her arm, tell her she was okay, and leave? That would be the right action. I had to keep my distance from her.

  I groaned. Who was I kidding? I knew exactly what I wanted to do, and for once I did it. I pulled back her comforter and slipped under it with her.

  She peeked at me through her fingers, and I held back a chuckle.

  I lay in her bed and opened my arms for her. “Come here.” Her hands slipped away from her face, and she stared at me with teary eyes. “I’ll take care of you. Come here.”

  She scooted closer, turning her back to my chest and fitting her tight little ass on my hips.

  I took a hard inhale. By the Everlast.

  What the hell? This was paradise, and I was going to enjoy it. I put my arms around her waist, placed my head on the crook of her neck, and inhaled deeply again, savoring her sweet wild rose scent and her perfect, warm body—clad in a skimpy tank top and shorts—pressed to mine.

  She sniffed and I tried snapping out of it.

  “Want to talk about it?”

  “It was the same nightmare,” she whispered. “But Morgan was there this time. He told me it was my fault, that I didn’t give him time to change back.”

  “Darling.” I placed a soft kiss on her shoulder, and she shivered shaking against me. I bit back a groan, desperate to jump on her, run my hands on her body, kiss her … I sighed, concentrating on her current problem. “It wasn’t your fault. If you want to blame someone, blame me. You were trying to save me, and I’ll be forever thankful for that.”

  “I know. But it doesn’t change the fact that I killed a human.”

  I brushed her hair away from her face and back to the pillow under us. My fingertips lingered on her neck. “You’ll be all right, darling. Everything will be all right.”

  She took a deep breath, pulling my arm that was over her tighter. My hand, guided by her, landed an inch under her breast. I wasn’t complaining.

  “I know,” she said. “It’s painful, but I’ll make it. It won’t be long now until the Soul Oath is complete and I’ll have peace.” I stiffened. Oblivious, she turned her head to me. “I will have peace, won’t I?”

  By the Everlast.

  She would. I wouldn’t.

  As if I could protect her from the Soul Oath with my bare hands, I pressed her even tighter against me, resting my forehead on her cheek. “I—”

  She squirmed, which didn’t actually help my cause. “Ouch, you’re gonna squeeze all the air from me.”

  Sighing, I loosened my arms, but only a little. “Sleep, darling. I’ll take care of you now. I promise.”

  3

  I left Nadine’s warm, soft body—and her bed—before she was awake. In fact, I got dressed and exited the apartment before anyone was awake.

  I hurried to the border of the wards, careful not to slip on the new snow.

  “Damn cold,” I muttered, zipping up my leather jacket. I should have gotten something thicker and maybe some gloves and a hat too.

  Fuck that. Where I was going should be warm.

  Once outside the shield, I transported to a forest. The scent of moss and wet leaves invaded my nose even before I could process it was pitch black here. Wrinkling my nose because I hated those smells, I cast a flame of light over my palm and looked around. Tall, thick trees surrounded me, but they were still green, which meant I was in the right place.

  I darted, weaving between trees, roots, and bushes. I slowed right before reaching the clearing. I stepped onto it, gawking at the cottage identical to the one on the Croatian island. I hadn’t been here in decades, maybe a ce
ntury.

  Seeing light through the windows, I hurried to the door. It opened before I could knock. Hesitantly, I entered the tiny living space and found the Fates in front of the fireplace.

  “Hello, Mitrus,” they said in unison.

  “We need to talk.”

  The three of them turned to me in a choreographed movement. They looked as if they were made of pure magic. Their faces lacked wrinkles, but they still appeared old and wise with their silver hair, gray eyes, and too pale skin. I had always thought of them as witches since I first heard the term thousands of years ago.

  “We cannot help you,” Lavni said, Witch Number Three of the Future.

  “I know.” I took a few steps forward. “But I need to try.”

  “You cannot alter the past,” Mani said, sitting down on the ragged brown love seat. She was Witch Number One of the Past.

  Changing the Soul Oath would be the best option, but also an impossible one. “I-I don’t want to alter the past, I want to guarantee a future,” I said, staring at Lavni.

  She shook her head. “I’m afraid you wasted your trip, for we cannot help you.”

  Frustration laced my muscles, and I grunted. “Please, hear me out. Talk to me if you can, but if you can’t, just hear me.”

  The three women exchanged deadpan glances; it got on my nerves. After a moment, they looked at me and nodded.

  “We’ll hear you,” said Nay, Witch Number Two of the Present, sitting on a short stool in front of the fireplace. “But we can’t promise to do more than that.”

  “It’s okay.” I stood at the edge of the living room, afraid if I got too close they would shut me down. I was a god all right, but the Fates were the ones who oversaw it all, who knew it all. They might not create the future, but they could change it if they wanted. If they saw fit. “I’ll take what I can.”